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Lonely and desperate for a niche

Hello my queen... Sorry about the chapped lip in my profile. My name is Tom Sanders. Ive been for years sending counltess pitfiful essays such as this to peopple but could never be cared for. Only was i abused. Ive learned my place and i coincidentally stubled into here and i feel its fitting for me to be a slave.... i hate who i am and want to be of use to a dominant person. The reason im here, is because i dont know my niche in life. I cant find myself. I cant cope in this world. I have high functioning autism and due to both that, and complications in my beliefs and ideals, i am unable to ever find friends... i get bullied my whole life both online and in real life. Im just here for others entertainment... I realize my life is over. im too scared to commit suicide. I have only one way out, and that is to engage with someone stronger than me and be of use to them and fullfil my niche in life by being a tool. It took me some time to finally realize my niche and i realize your a master at controlling....and since im a nobody, im easy prey... im Im a nobody, a defect, a loser. Will you deign interact with me? God bless... I didnt even begin to scratch the surface of my pathetic existance and life story but i pray youll deign to hear more someday... I truly hope i did not act as a pest...
Ive had chances to improve but i just fail miserably each time. Noone would miss me if i died, so i may as well be someones property, because i no longer feel any "life energy" in me. Spit on me, crush me, do whatever you want. I used to think id grow up unique due to my autism but im a worm.
I cant do anything. All im capable of is being controlled, used, bullied, dominated, manipulated, and hurt. Im a living target. Ill do everything in my power to keep you pleased.
The act of pleasing a powerful woman like you will being a satisfying existance.
I have no human rights. You are in absolute control of our interactions and may manipulate me to your will. Ive learned to accept my place. I just want to be at peace.
but instead im constantly in fear of my betters, and as an ant, i deserve to be under your heal and crushed.
I just had to inform you as to how brittle i am. I wasnt trying to bleed all over you. Your not my baby sitter, your not my mom, your not my helper. Your my master, and i will bust my literal gut trying to satisfy you. NEVER will i give up because it is my duty, and sole purpose in life to please you. I will devote my life to you and do whatever you say at all times. I wont give up on life because im of use to you! I know i can be!
i have an hour long manifesto read but thats probably not a very tactful thing to lead with.... i hope youll tolerate my presense....
Let me just say, i am desperately striving to secure this niche, but im not good enough for anyone! My best isnt enough! I swear ill show you that my effort goes beyond human comprehension, albeit at a pitiful performance.... ill willingly endure any brutal punishment you wish to dish out at me for my incompetencies. im dead set on living as a slave. It will help me get into a flow and accept myself as a nobody, as i know i cannot ever change that fact. Ive tried so hard for so many years but ive failed
If i so much as get a one letter response from you, ive passed this test, as my only goal is to improve myself as a slave of my betters, and your reply will put me on the path. I have aspergers so i struggle with communication so i beg your leniency on my pathetic social skills
I am your permanent, full time slave, and property. Im yours, and your alone. Do to me whatever entertains you.
Tell me when youve read that...my superior.
if you deign to even write to me...
NOTE: I know i said i dont have human rights... what i said before was how i view myself, and is for the most part true. However, you might call me a hybrid of a sub, and a slave since I am an extremly sensative and frail person. i am extremly suseptile to BOTH physical and emotional pain. There is just one type of thing i cannot cope with, or function if they occur. I beg your leniency and for you to deign accomodate me a certain level of them... You can dominate me and make me your bitch but i am incapable of dealing with physical pain or physical damaging acts like food deficiency, dehydration, or sleep deprivation, or acts that provoke disease like putting your mouth on very dirty things... occasional spankings are fine. I couldnt do p.e because i kept getting injured and its due to me being over sensatized to physical pain as well as emotional pain. I cant take extreme conditions because im an aspie, AND i was born in the deep end and couldnt get out and am now hypersensitized and traumatized. I BEG YOUR LENIENCY!!! PLEASE in your heart have some level of empathy for a defected, retarded, loser like me! i am unable to function without a little freedom... You can be all dominant, i just beg a little mercy and leniency... i will worship you, i will be under you, i will massage you, kiss your feet.. im insignificant to you. I just beg of you to have a bit of leniency on someone like me... I already have alot of issues with stress and anxiety... please understand whoever queen is deigning to read this...please have leniency...have mercy...on a worm like me... Please.... i swear ill worship your feet all day, or something of the sort. ill show you how desperate i am for approval, and acceptance from a queen. ... I NEED THIS NICHE OF BEING A DOMINANT WOMANS BITCH!!! So due to me having the inability to have cope with, or function when doing those few things, you could say i have SOME limits, and incapabilities (albeit very few), but other than those few issues, i feel 110% a slave. Im more pitiful, desperate, incapable, more of a despicable piece of dirt, and more of my mistresses bitch than a sub would ever be. Im below subs. i couldnt get through school due to bullying and i havnt even been to college and have been ruminattig and squirming in bed imagining being loved. Im a despicable worm... no money or valuables to note of either. i tried going to college but got taken out all 3 times due to my inability to cope... Im the perfect person to be a 24/7 slave because i have been proven to be incapable of functioning in the outside world. i am looking to constantly serve a dominant person without having to interact much with the outside world like having a job because that just doesnt work out for me as ive seen. Thats partly why i thought i was meant to be a slave... I view myself at the bottom, and know its true from experience and thought. No sub would worship, or grovel at the feet of their mistress as i would. I also have many more things to tell you. I have an hour long manifesto about my ideals, beliefs, morals, past objectives, life story, and thought proccesses. I can also show you a discod im banned from where plarge groups of people relentlessly plan how to troll me when i thought they were being kind to me before... i can show you screenshots of me being turned down by every dominant woman in many discords and being banned everywhere. IM HATED IN LIFE I DESERVE TO BE A SLAVE. But if you could just find the pity to let me have these small acommodations due to my brittleness and anxiety attacks, i would be in true debt. Ik i dont have a profile pic. I can send you a pic of me, after you reply my godess.. im fairly good looking i would say. Please... let me have this niche in life i deserve with SOME level of flexibility...please my queen... PLEASE!!!!

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Appearance

EthnicityCaucasian / White
National heritageEnglish
BuildAthletic / toned
Height6' 0" (183 cm)
Eye ColorBlue
Hair ColorBrown
Hair LengthShort
Facial HairSideburns
Body ArtNone
Health ConditionNo problems
CircumcisedNo
My attractiveness:Attractive

Sexual Interests

"Off Limits":anything that inflicts physical pain or could give me disease